Dear <chairs>,

I am resigning my Assistant Professor position at Michigan State University effective January 2nd, 2015.

Sincerely,

CTB.

Anticipated FAQ:

• Why? I'm moving to UC Davis.
• Do you have an employment contract with UC Davis?? Nope. But I'm starting there in January, anyway. Or that's the plan. And yes, that's how this kind of thing happen. I'm carefully refraining from geopolitical commentary on Twitter at the moment :).
• Do you have tenure there? Nope. Wheels are still turning.
• Aren't you nervous about that? Not really. Even if I don't get tenure, they've promised to hire me. And if that doesn't work out, someone will hire me... right? Guys? Guys? Why did it go silent all of a sudden?
• Why didn't you use 'I am hereby...' at the beginning? I don't know, seemed pretentious.

--titus